It’s hard enough to design a career or find a job when you feel good about yourself, but if you’re feeling lousy, it’s next to impossible. Call it self-esteem, self-confidence, or self-worth–if it’s low, you’ll struggle with just about every career-related issue. Why? Because how you feel is behind practically everything you do, or don’t do.
Many of the people I work with are challenged by lack of confidence concerning their current career or their next career. Men often face an identity challenge (things that define me) when their career is in flux. Women tend to see it more as a security issue (am I safe?). These feelings can show up in a number of ways:
• Questioning personal value: Some people feel they just don’t deserve the job or career they really want, or they feel they won’t be able to achieve their dream job even if they try. These people believe the ideal jobs and careers are for other people.
• Low motivation: Others not only have trouble finding a job, they also have trouble looking for a job. They just don’t feel like trying, an attitude that often carries over into other areas of life. This lack of wanting to try shows up in feelings of anxiety, despair, and worthlessness, which can lead to depression, panic, or anxiety.
• Feeling overwhelmed: Still others feel completely overwhelmed by the process of designing a career or trying to find a job. They don’t even know where to begin and begin labeling themselves as incompetent or incapable.
As one person put it:
“I’m feeling very overwhelmed. Finding a job is like looking at a road map of the United States with hundreds of cities to choose from. I know some great places to go, but I’m not sure I’ll like them when I get there, leaving me feeling paralyzed and indecisive. I really want to be on-purpose and confident about where I’m going.”
Do any of these scenarios look familiar? If so, you’re almost certainly wrestling with issues related to your self-esteem. More than likely you’ll struggle with them and your career or job search until you land a great job or get some help.
Your best bet is to work with a certified career or professional life coach⎯someone who is highly trained in the issues of career design and work/life balance. Often, it takes an outsider to help us see that we are highly gifted and talented and that we do have skills and abilities to offer the world, especially the world of work.
You can get from where you are to where you want to be!
Will your attitude turn around overnight? For many that happens after talking with an experienced coach. So while you may still kick yourself from time to time, begin to pat yourself on the back just as many times. Celebrate even the smallest victories.
You’re worth at least that much!
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{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
You’re kidding! Its like you’re talking directly to me. Lets talk soon. Since my little set back end of March, Ive lost some confidence and motivation. I need a brother right now. I am scheduled to get a raise in June, but Id like to meet with the owner armed with some info about how much Im worth. What do you think?
Yonah
Nice post. A lot of truth to that.